"Almost a year ago..."

Almost a year ago since I migrated here in U.S from Philippines...
I found something while I'm cleaning my stuff, and the thing that I found was the one that I wrote in a piece of paper while I'm still adjusting and that was the time that I had a hard time of forgetting what I had in my past.
This is what I wrote:

"Having doubts in a situation is really confusing, even if you know what's right, there's still second thought that makes you more confuse and your mind doesn't know what to choose."

"I don't know if NOT loving someone makes me empty, or is it just me who pressured myself for something."

"Six months passed, I moved on with the heartbreak stuff but, it makes me so empty even if  I'm not. I'm so full, my mind is, as if there's no tomorrow but deep inside I am so empty, I feel so empty. I know love is like a drug as what other people say, that it is so addictive but sometimes it is too much that it comes to the point you need space and stop loving because it becomes so unhealthy for a person and it is a pain and when you cannot help it, you need to go to the rehab where you can be treated and heal that wound which is your broken heart. How we wish that there is a place for rehabilitation of the people who have broken hearts but, it seems like that would not happen."

When I read this quotes that I wrote, I never thought that I thought about this before, as if I never wrote it and I was not the person who wrote it anymore. Painful to think, but happy to encounter. My past would be a very great experience for me and those memories were the ones I will carry and remember for a lifetime.


-Faye

"Goodbyes& ends"

Who wants end? who wants goodbyes?
You're beautiful relationship is coming to an end..
You're best friends are saying goodbye...
It hurts so much, it is so painful to make something end  especially when it is so important or sentimental for you, saying goodbye to a very important person or material for you, in other words letting that person or material go, away from you. Some people were so materialistic, loving material and earthly things it's part of being a person but, the very thing that we need to think is a person that can never be replaced by anyone even expensive material things because, a person is a person who just have one life to live. Let's give importance to the people who are here with us, no matter how many fights we have had, no matter how much they are stubborn they are still human who needs love by the people who they expect that they will accept for who they are and what they are, their strength and weaknesses. Don't lose hope, every ending has a new beginning, every goodbye's have Hello's.

"TRUE FEELINGS?"

True feelings are the feelings that you don't just act out for pretending something that isn't real.
In terms of love, true feelings is the feeling that just came out without planning, even you try to hide it but, it just came out from somewhere without expecting.
Let me tell you a personal reason from a true story that happened and until now the answer is maybe.
There was a teenagers who knew each other for 1 and a half yr. since they entered the relationship they both knew that one of them is going to leave. They compromise and made a promise, thinking that  they felt "true feelings" but let me tell you something, they don't really feel the true feelings we are seeking for, maybe at that moment that was their thought, that was the message their brain was processing thinking that it was from their heart. When one of them left, everything changed even their friendship, they thought it will work out but, NO. It didn't, until now no one knows what's next, if they're love story had end or it is just a "pause" moment for their love story and waiting for the right time for their book to be open again...

"People who experienced failures are the ones' who succeed"

People who encounter failures are the one's who usually succeed in life. You know why?
First of all, take note of the word "failures" it's not "failure" it's with "S" which means it's plural, it's more than one failure. Well, people who failed many times are the ones' who always try and try until they got it right. The more you try, the more chances of succeeding. It's a matter of chance, when you take the opportunity to try it's either you succeed or you fail. Failure is always part of a human life, no human could be an exception to that, and no human who doesn't fail even the most genius person, they experienced failures in terms of experimenting but through failure they discover a lot of things, they use  their own failure or mistakes to make things right, they made it beneficial for them to know what's wrong what did they do and how did they fail through failure they surpass in a lot of things, they try and try until they got answers to their questions, until they do what they need to do and until they succeed. Failure may sound negative for people, but the truth is it depends on a person how they would accept their own failure. When you fail, it's not the end of the world for you, that's why people have chances, if you have chance to try again, why don't take the opportunity maybe, if you would try agin it would make you more better than before. EVERYTHING HAPPENS FOR A REASON, trust God, trust yourself and be humble in everything, it will make you a better person and it'll make you surpass every challenges in life.

"Time Runs so FAST"

Time runs so fast to the point that I didn't notice I will be going to celebrate my 1st yr. of being here in U.S. Well, even though I am able to survive living somewhere I am not really used to live, I still think of my friends, and family that I left way back home. It's not so easy to adjust, to move on and start a new life. Starting a new life doesn't mean you're going to forget your past and pretend it never happen. Starting a new life means you're going to create a new you with the combination of the old you. Your past gives you strength wherever you are now, people won't reach what they have now if they don't come from anywhere. I made a lot of decisions in my everyday life. Before I have a lot of dreams, a lot of simple kind of things like, I want to be as smart as my classmates, I want to be a first honor student, I want to go to U.S even just for once, I want to have a lot of friend and many many more... But now, all of that simple wishes came true without any expectation in myself, I just let myself live life  without expectation, I realized that one of the things that I don't really like is to expect, because expect is always with disappointment. I don't want to be disappointed nor to expect for nothing. My simple dreams came true because of giving everything that I can, to do the best that I can and to trust Gd whatever He wants for me, Expect The Unexpected. I always pray for something and I will ask God to grant my wish if it will be good for me, "if not I understand and it's okay if you won't because I trust you that you have greater things that you will provide for me." You won't be angry if your wishes won't come true if you understand why you don't have it.
*LIVE, PRAY, & LOVE*
YOU WON'T BE HERE, IF YOU DIDN'T COME THERE.
YOU'RE NOT HERE IN PRESENT IF YOU DIDN'T COME FROM YOUR PAST, so be glad you came there and accept the things that are already done, nothing will happen if you'll always go back to the memories you want to erase, because no matter what you do with that memory it won't happen again.
If something happened that you never wanted to happen, damage has been done so MOVE ON!.

"When we sinned against God, He forgives, when we planned to give up, he gives us strength to go on."

As I journey my life, I draw more closely to God but, it doesn't mean I am not tempted anymore. I am unworthy, no one is worthy, but God alone.  

When I committed sins against him, He FORGIVES. 

When I planned to give up, He gives me STRENGTH to go on.

When I am in pain, He HEALS me.

When I prayed, He answers.

God may answer Yes, Just wait, and No , When we asked for something in him through prayer, He gives signs about his answer, He knows what's best for us. Don't just open your eyes, open also your heart to see. Don't just pray and pray without works. When you asked for something, worked on it, don't just wait without doing anything because nothing will happen, God is there to help, guide, protect and accompany you in your journey, he is your best friend that will never leave you, he is just there waiting for you to open your heart to see him, he will be there wherever you are. You can't see him when you're feeling angry and when pride is overwhelming you. Be humble, good, and show obedience in His commandments and you'll see.

It may be hard to do all the commandments of the Lord, take it easy but sincerely, step by step it's like climbing a stairs, it may take too long but at the end it's worth it.

Faith without work is Dead. It's like a body without soul.  

"Heaven is on Earth"

People who believes in one God are the ones who are successful.
Some people are successful both Heaven and on Earth, some experienced so much pain, and hatred on Earth because of doing the right thing but surely be comfortable with God in Heaven.
I don't know what heaven looks like, but I have no doubts that in Heaven you will experience happiness and equality. Doing the right things results to good consequences but, people are tempted by things that aren't necessary like Earthly things, being obsessed with money and power, that they forgot what's the right thing to do and their mind were swallowed by the temptations and committed sin against righteousness.
Doing the commandments of the Lord results to GOOD LIFE and there's no reason not to do it.

As I journey my life going to other places, I've discovered that there are a lot of people who don't believe in Him. They're baptized but, don't have belief and faith. I am not against them, but it's just painful for my part because they don't love what they should love. Faith is the connection through your soul, having something to believe in life is how you feed your soul.
As what I learned form my past lessons in school, Jesus performs a lot of miracles here on Earth that are experienced in Heaven and through this, God brings Heaven on Earth. Today, miracles are rare to witness, but it's not how you see it, it's how you believe that it happens, that it existed.
It is not always to see, is to believe. Some things in life are mysteriously happening that even Science cannot explain, they may have theory and evidence that make people believe. Science and my Faith can be connected, Science shows a lot of amazing things and they helped my Faith grow more stronger because it shows how amazing my God is. He created smart and genius people to explain these things, He created life, and different things to learn in this life, that makes it not boring for people. Life is about having fun with challenges and not to give up on it.


"Heaven is on Earth"

"The empty space"

Did you try to put chemicals on a bottle?
Let's say there's 3 bottles with chemical, the chemical A, B & C .
There's always a time to put the right chemical in each bottle. The chemical A must be put by the end of the day, The B is for the next 2 days and the C is For 7 days. There's always a right time for everything..
We put the chem. A at the end of the day....
After 2 days we put the Chem. B ...
But, we are impatient, curious, ignorant and we want to put Chem. C even if it's just the 3rd day.. We know that the right time is at the 7th day but still we put it on 3rd day.
But, at the end, you realized we should put the Chem. C at the right time because the result won't be good and accurate. So, you let go of Chem. C and start another experiment.
It's like teenagers, we experienced puppy love but, sometimes we go over the limit.
We enter serious relationship, even we know it's not the right time, and if we enter that kind of relationship it may cause pain, stress and damage in our life.
We know it's because of uncontrollable desire, curiosity, ignorance and for being impatient.
Some people, who are open-minded could see the right path and knows and admit that they did wrong.
But, some people who only relies on their own understanding and decision without opening their mind to other people who are concerned and giving right wisdom for them, couldn't even hear what other people say, people could be stupid in terms of being in the situation of being blind. They are closed-minded person that they will just listen to the people who aren't against them, who supports their decision even if it's wrong.
When you realized that you did wrong, and you're about to move on, it's a long term process but, some people could just make it short, if and only if you're willing to. But, after you moved on, you will feel this emptiness inside you that makes you feel there's something missing that you can't even figure out what, why and how. But, it's the sign that you're already moved on. The space within you is the space that you let go during the process of moving on. So, it's like letting go of Chem. C , you threw everything, you let go, moved on, and start another one.

** Make sure you will fill the space at the right time. If you don't want to start all over again.

:Love is Blind"

Love is really blind and I could prove that, people could prove that especially, people who was being blind by LOVE.
I am still a teenager 15 years old for now, and I started to be in a serious relationship when I was 13, and I could say now, that I am too young and I didn't even notice at that time. I was so blind and ignorant that I couldn't control my own thoughts maybe because of my "curiosity". I thought I could be someone in his life until I graduated college, we planned together that we'll wait, our relationship could be describe as faithful but, hidden. "Relationship won't grow in a hidden process of LOVE" I know that I will not be allowed by my parents to be in a relationship especially my brother, my brother is more like a father to me and I promised that I won't be in a relationship until, the right time comes, but when I promised I already broke it before I say the word "Promise" because I already have and I am in a relationship at that time. I could say that I am so right at that time for some reasons like, he became my inspiration, he lessens my loneliness, I felt loved, I feel so protected and comfortable but now, I realized I don't need all of it for now, it's not the right time, I have a complete happy family to be with, who could fill all the reasons I said and it could be more than that.
Now, that I am out of the in L-O-V-E situation, I could say that I am so wrong and I regret it, I moved on but, not to the point that I plant grudges and hatred in my heart, maybe I planted some but, when the time comes that I realized all of these, the grudges and hatred all died and replaced with life and happiness. I thought I won't be able to move on but, I did it's just that your mid says no even if you can, "it's the free will" that makes you do everything you want, if you want that to happen you can if you would, don't say you can't if you didn't try it yet. "Don't judge your future if you aren't still there, because you never know"
all things change as how time passes by, it doesn't stop so there's always a way, and there's always hope.

*Learn*
"SMART PEOPLE LEARN ON OTHERS MISTAKE,
STUPID PEOPLE LEARN ON THEIR OWN."

and I admit, I became stupid in terms of love because I was BLIND and became deaf because I keep my ears hear all those wisdom from other people but, I just ignored it, that makes me so stupid that I rely on my own understanding and decisions.

I'm so sorry for my brother, he trusted me but, I broke his trust for me, I was so deaf and stupid,
He was hurt and he never deserves to be hurt by me.

"If i have the chance to..."

If I have the chance to love again,
I would take the risk but, in the right time.
If I have the chance to move on,
I did it already.
If I have the chance to go back,
I would without doubts.
If I have the chance to go back to someone,
it would depend.
But, if I have the chance to go back to someone who broke up with me,
I won't have doubts to say NO.
N-O.
(for now)

tralalalalal..
Give yourself a space and realize the things that you never did.

"I MOVED ON"

I had a friend,
way back home @ Davao..
She is a funny friend.. She changed me a looott.. than who I am before, I began to be someone I'm not but I should be..
But, that's not my point in my story..
When I left going @ U.S , in instance her love of her life went here to but, somewhere that's far where I am now.. we're both in a stage of Moving On.. trying to figure things out without the person / people who you trust or whom you love..
oh well, moving on is always been part of our life, we just use this term more common than adjustment..
but then, from December to May most likely t's already been 5 months had passed since that moving on thing.. I asked her let's just say: "Do you still <3 him?" and this was her reply: "somewhere deep deeep deep deep way deeepper sa heart ko love ko prin XD!" ohyea..  don't want to state the whole reply but this was the mesg. she meant ..
and my point, no matter how you break up with someone even though how hard it was to accept, you can still figure out within yourself that you ove that person "no matter what" / "unconditionally" but, we know as time passes by in our lives it changes the habit, lifestyles, thoughts and feelings as well, no matter how hard we try not to change but it's just the reality that we can't control, maybe some people do, but I have no idea how...

This is what life is.. Full of mysteries and it's interesting . :) so always take the risk.

"Being Brave Isn't Enough Without determination"

Bravery isn't the key for everything,
 for winning something ?
A BIG NO !. You can't win without examining your inner energy, without a determination within you..
What is bravery ? and what is determination?
Bravery is shown when a person fights his/her fear, he/she is taking a risk knowing that it is possible for him/her to fail on what he/she is doing.
And determination is when a person has a fixed goal and he/she is striving to aim it, even though he/she knows it's hard but when he/she is determined he/she perseveres to do what it takes to aim what he/she wanted, it's his/her direction in life, it's what a person wants to achieve.

Let's say you are in a competition, and of course, when you are a contestant your goal is to win. So, we know that being part of  a competition isn't an easy task and even we're used to be in a competition, sometimes we just feel nervous and that's how bravery comes in.. we find our inner strength to face the fears inside us, we have this thoughts coming in our mind that inspires us, maybe it's from someone we really know or from someone's wisdom that makes us strong.
When the contest starts, we're already brave to face that kind of challenge, without turning back and when the contest is about to end, and the opponent has a high score than you, it's the time that determination glows inside you, you will make yourself remember every single training you did before that contest and you will persevere to aim what you want, to reach your goal, to beat your opponent and to win.

Bravery and Determination is already in you when you first accept that kind of challenge, you're brave to accept and take the risk even you know it's possible to lose and determination shows up when you train yourself for that prize "to win" and you should not lose hope whenever you lose or you got beaten up, as long as you did what you can do and you did the right thing and always put in mind life is a journey it's a long long trip and there's so many places you could go as long as you take the risk and you did the best that you can and no regrets shows up.. :)

"When You Lose Hope"

For sure in person's life, they've experienced losing HOPE,
even just in little things, in school, in a game, in everything that tests us.
We're not that perfect to accomplish things the way we want it to be,
but, we know deep in ourselves that we could.
All that we need is perseverance and determination in order to pursue what we need,
but it's just that, there are instances that keep us away from the goal we want to aim, that's what we called "barrier" and sometimes it causes us to be hopeless.

But, if we we're going to try, looking ourselves in the sight of others, for sure that confidence we had before will be ragained again, but, it really takes time, it's not just a one snap of our hand and then, we are back again, it's just that we need to take more time to adjust.

When you Lose HOPE,
think of what you really are,
who are you, why did you lose hope?
just reflect in every aspects of your life,
if what had happened, and then try to make a change on yourself,
to bring back of what you really are.

"Trying to forget the past"

Past experiences makes you feel good and others makes you bad..
It's part of the life we had to accept, we need to know and learn to live with it.
Our past makes us grow, makes us become mature and creates who we are today.
What we had in past is in the past, we can't do it again in present the way it happens.

Some experiences we had, we want to bring back again.. some of it, we hope that it never happens, which particularly says that Life isn't fair and things in our Life doesn't always happens the way we want it to be..

Let's just say,
There's an embarrassing moments in our life that makes us feel bad, we lose our self-esteem because of what happened.. but, what happen, happens .. past always stays in the past it never happens in the future anymore..

"Life is not about finding yourself, it's about creating yourself.."

so don't waste your time in every circumstances that you know you will not grow. Life is too short, do what you can do and take a risk . <3

"Love Moves in Mysterious Ways"

Love moves in mysterious ways..
we don't know where it will happen, when it will happen and who is the person behind it.
Love is Magical and full of surprises..
We don't know how to define it in just a word, but we know how to feel it..
Love is more than a feeling we deserve to feel.
It's not just about the person and you but it also matters the person that surrounds you.
Relationship won't grow in a hidden process of Love..
It must be real, open and selfless..


Don't let the relationship ruin your relationship with others,
that's the biggest mistake you'll ever do and the biggest regret you can make, if that kind of a person doesn't deserve the pain.

LIFE is a ROAD

Life is like a road, it's a journey you have to explore and a path you have to walk in to.
You meet new people in every road you take, in every street you go.. in every country you visit, sometimes when you stay longer in a road walking with people, they become your friend then, best friends then as time goes by, you consider them as part of your life.
Sometimes the road is rough that's how you have problems, but every problems you have, you always find solution to solve it..
In every stop light you went through, you always have to wait, you have to be patient in everything, sometimes you get late, sometimes you're so early .. That's how Life goes..
Life is not fair ..
sometimes you go up and down.. It's like hiking..
You went to hike to go up and when you reach the top, you have to go down and start all over.
It's never been easy..
It's never been easy to climb up the mountains to reach something, to reach you goal.
when people reached it, sometimes they stay there.. but doesn't mean they don't have problems anymore.. in that mountain, they also have a road, a road to go through but, they feel comfortable because they know they reach what they wanted. But still, they never forget the experiences they took when they're climbing that mountain where they are now..

"Letting Go""

"Letting go of your past is not to forget, or block memories, or stop to think about, or pretend the feelings are not there. It’s about the ability to think about your past with no feelings of anger, jealousy, hurt or regret.

Letting go is not about wishing things could have been different and dwelling in the past. It isn’t about thinking sad memories that leave you empty and hurt. It isn’t abou...t loss or defeat.

To let go is to cherish the good memories, learning and growing. It’s about being thankful for the experiences that once made you laugh, made you cry, made you who you are today. It’s about having the courage to accept that people change and things change. It’s about having the strength to overcome the pain and move on. It’s about all that you had, all that you have and all that you will gain if you were to let go. Letting go is to release your past and grow and live for your present and your future" - Rita Zahara.

"His Message"

When I open my FB..
I received a message from my best friend before..
and when he said he gotta go..
I open my inbox with messages I received from him before..
As I was reading his message..
I cried so hard as if it would never last..
FLASHBACKS starts and I started blaming myself in my mind and my regrets makes my heart beats so fast ..
I remember the time that I didn't reply to his sweet messages because, I thought it's the best thing to do for him and for me to adjust, but now I  know it's wrong...
The message he sent me that says "I'll be right here w8ing FOR U 4ever"
The concerns he had for me when I was sick.
The feeling he felt for me that I still want to feel..
I ask myself..
Why ? why? why?
What did I do.. ?
why this things went so wrong..
His Christmas messages for me with sweet words make me so weak..
I wish I could brought back the time..
But I know I can't..
I just have to accept what happen and what had happen..
I can't do anything but to accept what's the result..
Things must happen..the way it should be..
and I'm pretty sure GOD has plan more better than we expected..

True Love waits and it never loses Faith..

Do you believe ? ..
For me, I believe.. it will wait even it will take forever..
Since I met someone.. my whole life change, I've been doing good in everything especially at school, I was inspired. But, something happened which took as away from each other...

FUTURE is the one who can tell what's next..

TRUE LOVE

Of all the person I've ever met
u are the one that i will never forget
u used to be my friend
the most special friend
I admit that I really love u

Coz I love u, not because of what u are
but because of what I am
when I'm with you my heart is true
so this is LOVE......

Remember when I said I really Love u
the fact is that I really do
u used to be my friend
the most special friend
I admit that I really love u...........................

Coz I love u, not because of what u are
but beacause of what I am
when I'm with you my heart is true
so this is LOVE...................

**This is a song ...
composed by someone special in my life..
He is My Friend, my Boy BEST friend, My Brother,
My inspiration, & my special someone..
But, I guess? this is the END..
:'((

"Every Life has a purpose"

This Life we have is already a blessing..
Why some people say they're not BLESSED?..
As we know.. Life is not really fair..
sometimes we are up, sometimes we are down..
But, all we need to do is "Live the moment"
cause.. every moment has a purpose...
every moment of our everyday is already planned..

For me, I am already honored to have this life.
It's a previlege to have this kind of Life..
Though, it's not perfect but having "LIFE" is perfect..
Many people strive just to live but, they have no choice but to accept the things that are happening to them.. most of the sick people want to "LIVE" . They want a normal LIFE.. but do they have a choice? No, they can't do anything with their health, if there's no cure. but,
YES, they have a choice..
they have a choice to live their life to the fullest..
they can be happy as they can, to experience what normal people do, they cover their sadness with happiness in their face...
It's sad to know that the people who can live normally don't want to live normal..
coz, most of them aren't satisfied nor contented of what they have..

Of course! I felt it too ... sometimes I envy those special children who's with their parents during school days, because I want to be with my parents too..
I want to be with them every single second of everyday..
because I know that we can't avoid things that we don't want to happen, we don't want them to disappear in our sight. But, do I have I choice?
Yes, I have a choice!
I can be with them every after school and I will make sure to spent even just a little time with them.

We don't LIVE in this world with the reason of "NOTHING" ..
We live in this world with the reason of  having a "PURPOSE"..

Purpose is the reason why we're here.. but, most people don't know what's their purpose.. LIKE ME..!
I know..
most of us don't know what's our purpose ..
but we'll know our purpose maybe at the end, or near the end.

People who are sick became a model for most people who are down..
they inspire many people, because of the kimf of life they have, they can make amazing things that rare people cam do, they strive hard to live and despite of their disabilities they still live the moment without any complains..

It's a LESSON for us...
Life teach us a lesson and Life is a journey ..
We're here to walk, run and climb until we reach the finish line.. we don't know if it is a mountain, a long road or a short road with tough ways .. every people have their own pathways..
and so we do..

When we're down..
Just refect and think! compare yourself to those who are in need, make them your inspiration and encourage yourself to continue the life you have...

Other people can't command you on how you would plan to live, neither people can't decide for who you want to be.. it's only you.. ONLY YOU!. 
You're the one who can save yourself, you're the one who can decide.. people like friends and family are jsut there to guide, support and protect you but they can't!..
they can never ever decide for yourself, it's not them.. It's you..
Ask guidance, ask protection , but decide foor yourself.. that's how this life runs for purpose.. :)

"What does love do?"

Love can do anything...
It's not just a feeling to feel, but an action to show..
there are many different ways to show ir.. but sometimes without words we can't affirm.
words MUST come with actions..
not only words and not only actions..

Love inspires us,
Love teaches us,
Love makes life more beautiful...

it depends on a person how they define LOVE in their life..
some may be hard
some may be easy..
but Love comes around and goes around..

"A Promise that was broken"

Leaving you isn't my choice...
it's the time that leads us to this,
testing the strength of Love and patience..
My feelings for you never change, but yours did.
The promise I said.. I still mean it but yours didn't,
The memories we had.. for me it still exist because the apin is still here,
But yours I don't know..
You never made me feel that you love me even if we're apart...

I don't know if you have a reason why you gave up..
I don't know if you just gave up because you want to be happy with your life,  or you just don't love me anymore or you just want to leave me...
there are many options inside my head and I have to understand..
even if you read this...
it's okay but if not I'm lucky...

"I WILL STILL" EVEN.....

I can WAIT even if you can't,
I'll still keep my PROMISE, even if you won't,
I will still LOVE you even if your love for me fades away ...

(I PROMISE to WAIT and LOVE you for a lifetime.)

"SORRY"

If there is someone I am very sorry with...

It is God who I decline sometimes, who I never gave attention when he calls me, even his full attention is in me..

God,
  I am truly sorry for neglecting you, I am sorry if sometimes I didn't give my attention to you. But I just realized.. every time I need you you're always there for me, FOR US, for those who need help. Even if this Life we have is not the way we wanted but I know there's a reason behind this story we have. Everything happens for a reason, and no matter what it is... it is for our GOOD if we chose to journey with you..

AMEN!..

I LOVE YOU GOD ! Thank you for sending your only begotten Son..

"Lenten Season"

The Season of Lent is here..
To those who are Christians and Catholics who believe in one God..
We know that we are the reason why He died on the Cross....

Everytime I see the cross 
I'm reminded that he gave his life for you and me.
We are the reason that he gave his life,
we are the reason why the Lord suffered and died. 
To a world that was lost he gave all he could give, 
To show us the reason to live.
We are the reason but he is the reason we live
thank you my Jesus 


--We Are The Reason--

"SIMPLE things makes the BEST THINGS"

Best things in our lives are composed of SIMPLE things ..

simple things makes up the best things that happens in our lives.. 

Relationship grows with simple things,

one simple smile makes someone happy..

Having a simple life is GOOD..

simple is easy, no problems, no bigger responsibilities, no etc.

being SIMPLE is BEAUTIFUL. 

" TRUST "

"TRUST"

Many people have it, many people want it, many people need it, many people want to bring it back.

Trust is a small word with 5 letters but, it is vulnerable, it's like a glass, once you broke it, it's hard to fix or it's like a crumpled paper when you make it straight it will not be the way it used to be. 

Friends that are far away

I am in a situation that my friends whom I trust, whom I loved, whom I used to be with, is FAR..
They are so far from me and I am so far from them.
But,
I am so Glad & Happy that despite of not being with them, even if we are far apart, we never have and we never set boundaries between me and them, we still communicate and they are the same as if I never LEAVE..
FRIENDS Like them, are HARD TO FIND,
 really hard to find..
That's why I treasure what we had, what we have and what we are right now.
Because I know someday the friends I once Had will became "SOMEONE" in the near future and no one knows it even their own selves..

Great things in life can happen in a blink of an eye ..
and we don't know who's the lucky person....
 maybe it is one of our friends..
"NO ONE KNOWS"

Even they are FAR ..
I'm still here,
if they go away,
I'm still here,
if they turn back at me,
& when they look back,
I'm still here..

I am a FRIEND who'll never change even if I'm not the best
 I will still stay ..

"My reality"

I once Planned to GIVE UP ,
I LOVED this LIFE I have , it's PERFECT, it's REAL, it's the life most people WANT..
but, with just one choice I made, with just ONE ...
I just felt the feeling of being ALONE even if I'm not, even my Family is around me but, I just felt that it was like THE END, that I don't have someone to LEAN ON, to SHARE my burdens with because my friends are so FAR ENOUGH for me to share my problems ...
But,
Luckily I DID NOT .. I DIDN'T GIVE UP that easily..
it's the TRUTH that ones you are trapped in a decision you made, a choice you choose you have to STAND by yourself, be STRONG and always feel the presence of someone who makes you feel you are strong.

GIVING UP is also a CHOICE ,
A serious CHOICE that anyone can choose, it's EASY to do, it's easy to choose & easy to make, but hard to get up once you chose it.
It's like going to a wrong door and was closed and locked, it takes time until one person helps you to GET UP, helps you to be out of the wrong door you entered..

Once you have a BIG BIG problem as if you can't solve it..
remember:
There's no PROBLEM that can't be solve, we know some of it are hard to solve, hard to find a solution but IT HAS, Problems have SOLUTION and the solution is within that problem, analyze and ask help.

"JUST BE AFRAID, JUST DON'T GIVE UP"
...TRY BEFORE YOU QUIT...

"Life isn't fair"

Life is not fair, it's not always the way we want to be, sometimes you are UP sometimes you are DOWN ..
it's the reality we need to know.. To accept what had happened, to see the reality that ones you've done it, "IT'S DONE" you can't brought it back .. you can't have a time machine to go back somewhere you want to change , but it's never been to late to make the mistakes and wrong things RIGHT ..
YES, we BLAME, we have REGRETS, we have DOUBTS, but all we need to do is to LEARN from it.
We know that it is already GONE, the things, moments and memories but we experienced it and that's what we should treasure ..

Someday Be Back Again
     by: Ingrid Marie Tubon

I can remember the days when we used to laugh and smile at all the times.
When we think our friendship will be forever mine... (but it's not alright)
Cause when the time passes by, same to you when you walk by..
The memories we shared will be kept right to to your heart
And when I think of you, I hope my dreams came true 
That Someday, be back again...

I know its true, that we're not there with you
But your face is all in our hearts..
Yourself remains in our minds....
Your voice says you'll be back again

Someday is a long time.. I wait for you
And everytime I see your smile, it reminds me of you
That you were here with me, smiling back at me
But its not reality but still, I know Someday.. be back again

Cause when the time passes by, same to you when you walk by..
The memories we shared will be kept right to to your heart
And when I think of you, I hope my dreams came true
My Friend you'll be back again....

I composed this song to my friend :)
The music of this song is not yet finished heheh :)
But the lyrics are done :)
Faye thank you for your friendship..
Your one of a kind..
I ♥ u
-Ingrid :)

-- This composition form my friend really touches my HEART.. even though they are so far .. they never FORGET me.. 
Ingrid is a special friend of mine.. she is simple but a smart one , she is humble and a helpful person with a GOOD HEART .. she TREASURES especially FRIENDSHIP .. living so faraway with them is hard .. but I KNOW SOMEDAY I'LL BE BACK AGAIN ... 
--ILOVEYOU SOO MUCH INGRID !---

[M/V] TAEYANG (SOL from BIGBANG) - WEDDING DRESS [HD]

Being HAPPY

Happiness is not a thing that we can touch, it is the feeling people want to feel,
each person felt this happiness..
but, sometimes it's just outside..
Most people felt sadness inside but cover it with happiness outside.
Some people fool their selves that they're okay no problems, they're happy but, inside it is the opposite.. 
it's so frustrating..
Happiness should not only be outside, it should also be inside ..
every single emotion counts.. 
Smiles cover sadness.. 
you can fool other people that you're "OKAY" even you're not,
 but, you can't fool yourself..


"Happiness is not meant to cover sadness, it's there for you to be happy inside & out"

"Living with REGRETS"

Living with regrets is such a complicated situation..

I mean.. when you have regrets in your life, you can't live your life happily..

you know why? because there's something at the back of your mind and that is sadness, shames etc.

regrets are often express in saying "sorry" to the person..

But, sometimes REGRET can be with you until your last breathe especially....

lemme give you an example.. 

when there's a person you hate or you are holding grudges to that person,

and you didn't know that his/her time is short to live here on earth.. 

and you just realize to say "Sorry" and make "PEACE" to him/her but when that time comes, "It's TOO LATE"  .. well, that's how life goes.. and it teach us a lesson..

when, you have grudges.. well, we know that grudges comes with pride.. you should not hold 'em too much..

I mean.. you should not hold that GRUDGE too long.. because we don't know what will happen next .. sometimes, people make mistakes.. 

EACH ONE OF US do have mistakes and we know the feeling to be scolded and we don't want that right? 

So, when someone did something that we don't want and he didn't meant that to happen, let's not come to the point that we hate that person, give 'em chance.. "Everyone deserves second chance" 

BUT, when that person do it over and over again.. Let yourself teach 'em a lesson..  

"DON'T HOLD GRUDGES"

-- So that you won't have REGRETS--

--15--

"Believe that every ending has a new beginning"

When you feel alone, or you feel so down, don't forget there's always someone who's willing to make you smile and pull you up..
If that someone is busy and you can't reach 'em then, make your self happy and learn to pull yourself up,
you can't always rely to other people,
don't put your strength to other person,
put your strength in yourself,
if NOT you'll be weak...
put God on your heart .. he will help you ..
if you're in darkness, He will let you see the LIGHT...

When there's a part of your life that is about to END, don't ever lose hope,
 "when there's a story that was about to end, there's a new story that is about to come.."
Our life is already planned, believe that God wrote our life story..
even some people don't have a good life here on earth maybe, there's a purpose.. of course we don't know that but, we can guess.. maybe, they will have more GOOD life on heaven where God is..
and when our LIFE is about to end in this world...
there will be another story coming....

"EVERY ENDING HAS A NEW BEGINNING"

"Don't press the delete button!"

When we want to forget something in our life,
we would wish that we can forget it as easy as pressing the delete button,
and delete it in the recycle bin so that we can't restore it again..

But, life doesn't run as easy as that...
because we aren't a computer,
we can't be repaired,
we have our own ways, thoughts & feelings..
and people don't run our lives, we run our own..

Sometimes, we have that kind of experience or happenings in our life that we don't want to happen because we chose that to happen,
even there were things that we don't really want but, still it happen ... maybe, it's the consequence of the things we did or it's just really meant to happen to teach us something we have to know.

That's how God made us...

Life is a mystery ...
it's too short...
we have to run our lives in a Good way..
because we don't know what will gonna happen after this life we have here on earth...

" Opportunities are important "

I refused so many opportunities in life,
especially when i was still a kid, i refused so many lessons to learn,
and i just realized that it was an opportunity that many people want,
and now I'm finding who I am in my new world,
but I know, it's not too late....


"When there's a door that was closed there will be another door open"
God never closes a door, if ever he closed one, there will be another one open....

"Good Opportunities are important,
NEVER refuse one"

"It's really HARD"

"Leaving someone behind is hard,
but to be left is harder"

When we have thoughts in the back of our mind,
most of it comes true,
It's really HARD when the thoughts at the back of your mind saying..
"your relationship you have will end" or "You will not have this or that" especially when you really want it..
It's really painful right?
but, you can't do anything with that,
you just have to be ready on what's going to happen,
so that when there's something happen that you don't really want,
you'll not be hurt soooo bad..

fear of losing someone you love..

                                                                                   

FEAR shows NO TRUST,

sometimes, 

being JEALOUS shows FEAR,

but, that kind of FEAR is....

the FEAR OF LOSING THE ONE YOU LOVE..

& it doesn't always mean you don't have TRUST...

it just shows you really LOVE that person... 

but it should not be "TOO MUCH"

REMEMBER: "FEAR is toxic in every Relationship, 

you should know how to get rid of it"

A Poem I made for my dearest FRIENDS ..

Smiles, laughter & tears,
are now only memories,
dreams, nightmares & fears,
things we share in cheers.


Missing the smiles, laughter & noise,
with my friends, best friends with choice,
we share our sides with a loud voice,
but, no matter how loud, we still have poise.


Thoughts, feelings & secrets,
things we share to our best friends,
blames, mistakes & regrets,
the things we don't want at the end.


even though we are thousand miles apart,
you will never be replaced in my heart,
saying goodbye is my life's hardest part,
but, I know this is one of the life's art.

Statue - Lil Eddie [2009 RnB] w/ Download

--You say that you LOVE--

You say that you love rain, but you open your umbrella when it rains.
You say that you love the sun, but you find a shadow spot when the sun shines.
You say that you love the wind, but you close your window when wind blows.
This is why I am afraid, you say that you love me too.
--William Shakespear--

"PROMISES"

They say: "PROMISES are meant to be "BROKEN"
well, in some part it's TRUE .. I already PROVED it to myself..
It's really PAINFUL, but we can't do anything but to ACCEPT ..
I more prefer NOT to say I PROMISE, if you're sure or not sure if you can do it..
but rather say, I'll try and then make an action..
That's why it's true that "ACTIONS speaks louder than WORDS"
Many people having Heart ache because of Promises !.. when you didn't make that Promise, you'll gonna LOSE TRUST!..
so might as well, Don't SPEAK.. If you can't..
I also LOSE TRUST, because I already broke a Promise..
and I learn from it.. It's a bit HARD because you know that there's a person who's holding a grudge from you and you lose trust from him/her,
It's really painful for me but I know it's more painful in his/her part.
and now I realized that kind of pain he/she experienced..
you know why?
there's a person whom I really trust who PROMISED ! that he/she will keep it until I gonna come back.. But, he/she messaged me that he can't keep that promise anymore..
I also understand his/her part, but on the other way it's still PAINFUL..

So,  I'm not saying that don't trust to the people who say "I PROMISE" but, just be ready and EXPECT the UNEXPECTED so that, when something happens you won't be hurt that BAD..

Don't Quit ! if you're afraid Just PRAY & TRUST in God ..

It's a LONG STORY, but I made it SHORT.. 


It's about a young girl who joined a contest because of a friend who said:
Friend: You are the one we chose to join this contest
Girl: okay 
friend: you're gonna be on training next week (afternoon) 
girl: alright!
The girl answer positively without any hesitation without any doubts... 
on that afternoon, the girl is with her friends, having their food trip at her house, she forgot that she has a training to attend, her friend called:
friend: where are you? 
girl: huh? 
friend: you have a training, remember?
girl: ohmy! I'm sorry, I forgot..
friend: we'll wait here, so come now !
girl: uhmm, i'm with my friends here at my house, I can't go.. 
Friend: come here now ! 
girl: uhm.. okay.
The girl ask permission to her friends that she will go out somewhere for training.. 
her friends said:
friend 1: okay. we'll be alright here, don't you worry..
friend 2: yea right sis ! we're ookay here so "good luck".
girl: are you sure?
friends: SURE !..
girl: okay, i'll gonna go..
So she went out for training.. when she arrived:
friend: so are you ready now? 
girl: I think so...
when they start the training, the girl get it hard, because it's her first time to join contest "ever" in her life.. and when the day is over she went home..
the girl is speaking only to herself saying.. 
girl: I don't know if I can do this anymoree..
and when the week is over.. the contest is fast approaching.. 
the girl is always crying and she seeks for advice.. 
girl said while crying: I can't do this anymore.. it's so hard ! i'm afraid !..
her friend said: you can do it !.. you said "YES" without any hesitation & doubts so you have to finish it..
and the girl just go to bed and prayed.. 
when the day comes finally.. 
the girl didn't feel anything, she didn't feel nervous nor excited nor afraid nor happy...
when the contest starts she doesn't know what to feel, she doesn't know what to do, she's out of her mind, and now she feels nervous and she did PRAY and now she's going to show up..


after the contest ...
it's the awarding time.. 
without even knowing what's the result.. 
the contestants are all called except her.. without knowing that she's going to win the 1st place.. 
and she was shocked... she didn't know what to feel.. 
some of the people don't like what's the result of the contest.. 
and she bare that pain until it was healed but still she can't forget what happened.. 
she said to herself: It's better that I didn't win if this would be the result.. that.. people don't like what's the outcome.. 


lesson: If you START, FINISH it.. DON'T GIVE UP!
 you can be AFRAID, but don't QUIT..
 if you are afraid.. just pray trust in God and he will do everything for you.. 
and if this kind of pain you will feel just say to yourself "it's DONE" no one can change what happened.. 
Just FOCUS in your PRESENT, FORGET about what you don't want in your PAST and AIM for your FUTURE..  

Grudges

I know many people knew what "Grudges" mean..
it's the pain we feel inside our hearts because of many things..
maybe because of family matters, friends, loved ones or other people who enter & became part of our life,
sometimes we forget to forgive people who committed things against us and that's how "PRIDE" enters our Life. Well, sometimes it really takes time to heal the pain we feel inside and it takes time to forget the things that happened and it also takes time to "FORGIVE" , sometimes until the very last breath of the person they never felt that they were forgiven ... 
there are things in our lives that we did, 
but we didn't meant to hurt other people,
we plan to ask forgiveness but, the person don't accept it.. 
if we're gonna put our situation to their situation, we'll also be hurt ...
That's the challenge in this world, 
we should learn things like this.. 
"PRIDE" is always there but learn to "Forgive, accept, forget & love"
Pride can never let you win in any battle, 
not unless you learn how to get over it..
When you have "Pride" it never makes you strong, it always makes you weak,
but to "Forgive" makes you strong, cause it shows that you know, people do make mistakes even how deep it was .. 


"Learn to Forgive & Forget"
<3 --15-- <3

What is LOVE ?

Do you know what's the TRUE meaning of the L-O-V-E word? ..
Some people define LOVE, 
but it's not the whole meaning...
the TRUTH is ...
LOVE is not meant to be explained,
It is meant to be experienced ...
Happy, Sad, Lonely, Pain etc. 
this are some of the feelings we felt in LOVE..
Love is not a material thing that we can touch, it's a feeling that everyone should feel.. 
all people feel this kind of feeling, NO ONE lives without this..
some people are being Hate but, it doesn't mean NO ONE loves them, 
People are not meant to LIVE just to be in pain and to be Hate by others,
but to be LOVED by others...

That's how GOD created us. 

<3 --15-- <3

Fall Out of Love

Did you know what's "Falling out of Love" mean? 
it's the opposite of "Falling In Love" .. 
It means that you don't have feeling for someone you love..
when we FALL out of LOVE, the feelings we have for that person disappears, the LOVE, HAPPY & EXCITEMENT we have for him/her is GONE , instead it was replaced by loneliness, sadness or any negative things you didn't meant to feel, especially when you're with him you feel so bored etc... 
It just happens when the person gave TOO MUCH for someone he/she loves,
giving TOO MUCH results into WASTE .. 
Let me compare the LOVE to WATER,
in a bottle, when you fill it with water and the space of the bottle is not enough it will overflow and the water will be wasted..  
it's like in a relationship.. when you gave TOO MUCH of your LOVE it will overflow and be WASTED ..


When you enter Relationship you should know what is the RIGHT & WRONG, because if you don't, you will be the one who'll experience the PAIN that you don't want to feel ...
When you Love.. you should not give TOO MUCH, you should Love YOURSELF, before you Love others, you know why? How can others Love you, if you don't Love yourself...
that's why everything STARTS in OURSELVES ...  

Our LIFE

This LIFE we have is a GIFT, we should treasure and prosper it, 

because it's priceless.. 

It's like what we receive from our love ones, we KEEP and TREASURE it.. 

It's not the money that counts.. 

it's the THOUGHT that counts.. 

LIFE cannot be compared in any material things,

You know why?

because LIFE can't be trade, can't buy, can't bring and cannot sell, while the material things, we can buy it, we can trade it into something we want, we can sell it to others, but this LIFE is the only thing we have in this world..

many people want LIFE, wants to survive, wants to have second chance to live & they want to feel that they lived but they CAN'T cause, they have something what normal people don't have, while the normal people who put they're selves into risks and they make reckless things, some of them plan to suicide, some of them plans to not live anymore, but they don't realize many SICK PEOPLE wants it, wants they're LIFE wants to LIVE happily..

That's why even me begins to be CONFUSED & CURIOUS .. WHY? WHY people can't reflect What they are, what they're doing, what they have & how LUCKY they are...

Some People, Don't know that they are given by God the PRECIOUS gift and that's LIFE .  

Remember: 

It's a PRIVILEGE to have LIFE because it's a GIFT from Most High. 

<3 --15-- <3

Moving On

in a relationship situation:
Moving on is HARD when you force your self to get over about what happen, especially when you try so hard to forget about everything special you had before... 
Moving on is not about forgetting the person you loved, it is the feeling you have to forget, because if you'll try to forget the person, it's impossible,
 it will take you a lifetime for that, not unless you'll have a amnesia or any kind of disease that involves LOSING your MEMORY.
Too much for that..
 well, let's get back to MOVING ON ! ..
In moving on, it will really take time, sometimes in your life you'll waste a time just for thinking about him/her, the things you've been through or you're favorite event that happen in your relationship.. 
Well, it's part of moving on... 
You just have to wait, when you can adjust and when you can slowly forget the feeling you have for that person..
you can do that by making yourself busy on what you want in your life and make it your PASSION for your LIFE to EXCEL !. <3  
JOURNEY your self into your OWN ROAD and make your paths STRAIGHT and set your GOAL at the END ^_^

--15--

Long Distance Relationship

Most people having a long distance relationship always lasts,

some of it prosper,

and some of it was frozen, never moving forward,

 because of this, that and many more...

 there are so many reasons and excuses, 

but relationship only need Trust, Patience, Loyalty, Honesty, Faith & knows how to keep promises and knows how to hold on for them to work the relationship out..




Distance doesn't matter if you really love the person, what matters is your honesty & 


trust for that future relationship to work out..


There is no long distance about love, it always finds a way to bring hearts together no 


matter how many miles are between them..


if the days won't allow You to see each other. memories will, and if Your eyes can't see 


Him/her, his/her heart will never forget you.. 


wherever you go, whatever you do, you know he/she loves you, He/she will be waiting 


always, whatever it takes, whatever's at stake, you know he/she'll be right here..